Imaginary Fights: Pluto Nash vs. Norbit

So, let me first start by saying, happy 4th of July.  Go out and spend it with family and friends (after you finish reading this post, of course). 

It’s been a while since I last visited the world of imaginary fights, and thought now would be as good of a time as any.  Besides after all of the celebration from the 100th post, I just don’t know if I can keep up…

At any rate, an interested match up came to me the other day, and specifically, it’s the battle for the worst Eddie Murphy movie belt.  That’s right, I’m talking about a match between Pluto Nash and Norbit.  It’s a battle for the ages, because no matter who “loses”, everyone wins.  Now, these are pretty terrible movies, so I might need to fill you in on them.

Pluto Nash, was released in 2002, and is often times thought of as one of the worst movies of all times.  Sadly, that last statement was not artistic license, but a complete statement of truth.  It takes place on earth in the future, where a former smuggler (a la Han Solo), is now a nightclub owner, and he is trying to keep his establishment from the space mafia.  (Again, sadly, I’m just stating the facts.)  Strange, Nash is not a witty character, like many of Murphy’s other more creative personalities.  In summation, a boring, flat, character has to struggle through a terrible, cliche plot, with horrendous support acting.  It’s the perfect storm of suck…

Norbit, on the other hand, was released just a short two years ago, and thought of as the movie that cost Eddie Murphy the Oscar for Dream Girls.  This film is a return to some of Murphy’s early movies where he plays multiple characters.  Now, one would think that this would be a great start, but it really just gets things going downhill.  Norbit, who grew up in an orphanage, and loses the love of his life after she is adopted.  He ends of married to a meanier, rejected character from the Klump family, in the Nutty Professor.  When his true love moves back to town, Norbit tries to win back his love, and survive a life with his monstrous bride.

So, the match up is between Pluto Nash and Norbit (the main characters of both).  My question to you, dear reader, is how should this whole thing go down?  Who has the upper hand?  Who has their back against the wall?  Who just plain wants to die?  I’d love to hear your input, prognosticating, and general guess.  Just leave them in the comments, and I’ll post how I think it would go down in a few days.

Until thing, dear reader, stay safe and away from these movies!